How to Silence Your Inner Critic: 6 Exercises You Can Try Today
Takeaway: The inner critic doesn’t have to be your enemy — it’s possible to quiet its voice by meeting it with curiosity and compassion. Using these gentle exercises that focus on mindfulness and self-compassion, you can begin to shift from self-criticism to self-empowerment. Through my unique blend of therapeutic insight and coaching tools, I’ll help you transform self-criticism into self-guidance with practical, compassionate strategies.
Have you ever noticed how loud the inner critic can get — especially when you’re standing at the edge of something new? Whether you’re preparing for a conversation that matters, reaching for a long-held goal, or simply trying to rest, that familiar voice tends to rise up with its sharp-edged advice: “You’re not ready. You should know better. You have to try harder.”
The truth is, this voice isn’t here to ruin you. It shows up because a part of you believes criticism is the only way to stay safe, productive, or “good enough.” Partnering with that part — rather than battling against it — is where real healing begins. The inner critic, at its core, is often a well-meaning but outdated strategy; one that helped you navigate past challenges, but no longer serves your growth in the same way.
Transforming Criticism Into Compassion
As a therapist and coach, I don’t believe in “silencing” your inner critic by force. Instead, I help clients befriend it—to listen with curiosity, soften its edges, and ultimately, partner with the part of them that believes criticism is the only way to get things done. Because when we meet that voice with compassion instead of resistance, something remarkable happens: it stops shouting… and starts collaborating.
Ready to transform your relationship with your inner critic? Below are 8 exercises to learn how to silence your inner critic and help you shift from self-doubt to self-compassion—starting today.
8 Exercises to Silence the Inner Critic
The inner critic isn’t something you need to conquer or silence with force — in fact, true change begins when you meet it with curiosity and care. These simple exercises are designed to help you shift out of negative self-talk and loosen the grip of self-criticism, so you can create more space for self-compassion, clarity, and grounded confidence in your daily life.
1. Name & Befriend the Critic
When that critical voice pipes up with "You’re not good enough" or "You’ll never succeed," pause and simply name it: "Ah, there’s my inner critic again." This tiny but powerful act creates space between you and the thought, weakening its grip.
Try this: Instead of fighting it—which often fuels low self-esteem—try responding with curiosity: "I hear you. What are you trying trying to tell me" or "What are you trying to protect me from?"
Over time, this practice rewires self-judgment into self-awareness. When you stop seeing the critic as the truth and start seeing it as just one part of you, self-confidence grows—not because the critic disappears, but because you’ve learned you don’t have to obey it.
2. The “But” Reframe
Your self-critic loves to speak in absolutes—"You always mess up" or "You'll never get this right." But here's the truth, your inner monologue doesn't have to be one-sided.
When you notice a critical thought, pause and add a gentle "but" followed by evidence of your strength:
"I feel unprepared for this meeting... BUT I've handled tough situations before."
"I'm not where I want to be... BUT I'm making progress every day."
This tiny pivot interrupts the critic's all-or-nothing thinking and reminds you of the full picture—one where resilience and growth belong.
Try This: Keep a running list of your "buts" in your notes app or journal. Over time, you'll train your brain to spot possibilities, not just problems.
3. Somatic Grounding Practice
When negative thoughts overwhelm you, your nervous system is often stuck in overdrive—that racing heart and tight chest making your inner voice feel even louder. This practice helps you reset from the body up.
Try This:
Pause wherever you are (preferably somewhere quiet and safe) and plant your feet firmly on the ground.
Breathe deeply into your belly for 4 counts, hold for 4, exhale for 6.
Name 3 things you can touch (e.g., your chair, your sweater, your pen).
With each sensation, whisper: "Here, now, I'm safe."
Why It Works: By anchoring into your senses, you signal safety to your nervous system. The critic's volume naturally dims when your body remembers it's not actually under threat.
4. The Compassionate Voice Exercise
When self-loathing takes over, that harsh criticism can feel like the only voice you hear. But what if you could cultivate a kinder, wiser voice—one that speaks with the warmth of someone who truly loves you?
Here's how to begin:
Pause when you notice self-judgment arising. Place a hand over your heart.
Ask: "What would my most compassionate friend say right now?"
Whisper those words to yourself, even if they feel unfamiliar at first.
Example: Instead of "You're such a failure," try "This is hard, and you're doing your best."
Why It Works: With practice, this exercise rewires neural pathways—softening the habit of self-attack while strengthening self-trust.
5. Write a Letter from Your Wise Self
When self-criticism takes over, it can feel like you’ve become your own worst enemy — stuck in a loop of judgment and fear. But even in those moments, another part of you exists: the calm, grounded inner presence often called your Wise Self. This part isn’t swept away by self-doubt or harshness — it holds a steady, compassionate view of who you are.
Inspired by practices like Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS), this exercise invites you to write a letter to yourself from that Wise Self. When your inner critic feels overwhelming, imagine your most compassionate, grounded self—the part of you that knows your inherent worth—writing you a letter.
How to Begin:
Set aside 10 minutes in a quiet space with pen and paper.
Address the letter to yourself in this moment of struggle (e.g., "Dear me, I see how hard this feels right now...").
Let this wiser version of you offer:
Validation ("Of course this feels challenging").
Perspective ("This is just one chapter of your story").
Encouragement ("Remember how you've grown already?").
Why It Works: This practice creates psychological distance from the critic while strengthening self-trust. Over time, you'll internalize that your wise self—not your inner critic—holds the truest voice.
6. Body Gratitude
When we’re feeling vulnerable or caught in a cycle of self-criticism, our bodies often bear the brunt of that tension. You might notice your shoulders tightening, your jaw clenching, or your breath becoming shallow. These physical signals are often a reflection of negative thoughts, and they can keep you trapped in the grip of harsh judgment.
The body gratitude exercise is a simple yet powerful way to invite more compassion into your experience.
How to Practice:
Place both hands gently over your heart or another area that needs kindness.
Breathe deeply and silently thank your body for:
One thing it did today (e.g., "Thank you for getting me out of bed this morning")
One thing it withstood (e.g., "Thank you for holding my anxiety with such patience")
Notice any softening in your posture or breath as you offer this gratitude.
Why It Works: Physical touch combined with appreciation activates the parasympathetic nervous system, creating safety that quietens the critic. Over time, this builds a loving alliance with your body—exactly where healing begins.
From Inner Critic to Wise Ally: Your Path Forward
If any part of this struggle sounds familiar, please know this: the work isn’t about silencing your inner critic with force, but learning to partner with it. True behavior change happens when we meet these protective parts of ourselves with curiosity and compassion—exactly as we’d approach a dear friend who’s afraid of failing.
As you try these practices, I invite you to notice: Where does your critic soften when met with kindness? What small shifts become possible when you lead with self-trust instead of fear?
If you’re feeling called to explore this work more deeply—with personalized somatic tools and the support of someone who’s walked this path—I’d be honored to guide you. In our 1:1 coaching sessions, we’ll:
Collaborate with your inner critic (not against it).
Cultivate embodied self-trust through mindfulness.
Create sustainable change that honors your whole being.
Let’s begin the conversation. Your wise self is waiting.
